How do you keep a blonde in suspense?

        (I'll tell you tomorrow.)

Why do blondes wear shoulder pads?

        To keep from bruising their ears.

Why does a blonds bra say T.G.I.F?

        Tits go in first.

Why do blondes have vaginas?

        So guys will talk to them at parties.

What do you call a blonde wearing a leather jacket on a Harley

        Rebel without a clue.

Why dont blondes breast feed their babies?

        It hurts too much when they boil their nipples.

What does a blonde answer to the question "Are you sexually active?

        "No, I just lie there."

What's the first thing a blonde says in the morning?

        "Thanks, guys..."

Why do blondes hate M&Ms?

        They're too hard to peel.

What does "Bones" McCoy say before he performs brain surgery on a blonde?

        "Space. The final frontier"

What's brown and red and black and blue?

        A brunette who's told one too many blonde jokes.

What do you call a brunette and three blondes on a corner?

        You don't, you see if you've got 3 condoms.

Why did the blonde keep ice cubes in the freezer?

        So she could keep the refriderator cold.

How did the blonde break her leg playing hockey with the Toronto Maple Leafs?

        She fell out of the tree.

Why don't blondes like making KOOL-AID?

        Because they can't fit 8 cups of water in the little packet.

How do you give a blonde a brain transplant?

        Blow in her ear.

Why does a blonde have fur on the hem of her dress?

        To keep her ankles warm.

How can you tell a blonde had a bad day?

        Her tampon is behind her ear and she doesn't know what she did with

         her cigarette.

What does a blonde say after multiple orgasms?

        Way to go team!

How can you tell if a blonde has a vibrator?

        By the chipped tooth.

What can strike a blonde without her even knowing it?

        A thought.

How many blondes does it take to play Hide and Seek?

        One.

Why couldn't the blonde write the number ELEVEN ?

        She didn't know what ONE came first ...

Why don't blondes talk when having sex?

        Their mothers told them not to talk to strangers.

What do you call a blonde with 90% of her intelligence gone?

        Divorced.

What do you call a blonde without an asshole?

        Divorced.

How many blondes does it take to make a circuit?

        Two, One to be in the bathtub, and another to pass her the

        blow dryer!

How is a blonde like a postage stamp?

        You lick'm, stick'em,and send them on their way

How do you describe 3 prostitutes and a blonde?

Ho, Ho, Ho, good night.

What do you call a bunch of blonde; with yeast infections?

        cheese party!

What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10?

        She goes home

Where do blondes go to meet their relatives?

        The vegetable garden

How many blondes does it take to play tag?

        One.

Why did the blonde want to become a veterinarian?

        She liked kids ...

Why don't they let Blondes swim in the ocean?

        The tuna are starting to smell